Your boss, the CEO, walks out of a high stakes board meeting. No one says anything, but the tension in the room is palpable. As the executive assistant, you feel it immediately. The question is: do you know what to do next?
Executive assistants (EAs) aren’t just the power behind the throne. They are the ones who regulate the nervous system and vibe of the whole office. Good EAs can manage calendars, coordinate travel, prepare briefs, track budgets, follow up on action items and keep their boss running on time. But the best EAs understand the unspoken language of intention, motivation and emotion.
“Most of EA training is tactical,” says founder of EA Enneagram Molly Medvecky. “But if you really want to elevate yourself, EQ is the thing to cultivate.”
What is EQ?
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the ability to recognize, understand and manage your own emotions while also being aware of the emotions of others. It includes skills like self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, internal motivation and social skills. High EQ allows someone to navigate relationships, handle conflict and make decisions with emotional clarity and insight.
Shares Medvecky, “As an EA, you are in those rooms, partnered with people making big decisions so being able to read that room is really important.”
Her tool of choice to help fellow EAs read the room and interpret the unspoken but very real undercurrents? The Enneagram.
What is the Enneagram?
The Enneagram is a system of human personality that helps explain why people behave the way they do. Some people call it the Rosetta Stone of human behavior while others call it the GPS of wisdom. If you have ever wondered “why did that person do that?”the Enneagram might have your answer.
The system outlines nine distinct ways of experiencing the world, helping to see your natural strengths, motivations and blind spots. To learn your Enneagram type you must answer a central question: “Where does your attention go?”
The system recognizes that we are all unique individuals, but it outlines nine basic places where we might focus. This is called your habit of attention, and it maps to a personality style. Are you hyper competitive and focused on winning? You might be a Type Three Achiever. Or do you focus on ways to maintain harmony and avoid conflict? You might be a Type Nine Peacemaker.
Medvecky had been an EA for several decades before she found the Enneagram, but she quickly became a convert because she saw how versatile and useful the tool could be.
“Knowing your Enneagram type will allow you to make better decisions, communicate better and create better workplace vibes. EAs are situationally positioned where we touch everything in an org, whether it is directly or indirectly. While our customer is internal, we are customer facing and we have the ability to change rhythms and office patterns. Once we understand where we are coming from and why, it can be really powerful.”
Consider Lucy, a 34-year-old EA supporting a senior leader at a pharmaceutical company.
Lucy was good at her job, but she was in a dark space psychologically. She wasn’t interested in socializing with her colleagues, and she got triggered by all the last minute requests that came in her line of work. She was starting to wonder if something was wrong with her and if maybe she had picked the wrong career.
She started coaching with Medvecky and within two sessions, she learned she was a Type Five Investigator. Type Fives have a habit of attention that focuses on concerns they will be overwhelmed by the demands of the outside world. They are boundaried, thorough, and they value data and knowledge. Socializing is typically draining for Type Fives, who prefer to work independently and conserve their time and energy.
“When I learned Lucy’s Enneagram type, I was able to explain to her that there wasn’t anything wrong with her–she was wired for withdrawal!” laughs Medvecky.
By learning her natural thought patterns, they were able to develop strategies to accentuate the things she was good at: thorough preparation, stellar research, careful planning, an unparalleled ability to focus and an accurate, literal way of communicating.
Suddenly the fact she didn’t want to stay for after-work drinks had a different frame. It wasn’t that she didn’t like her colleagues. It was that she was operating from a sense of feeling depleted. “Just naming it took the edge off.” shares Medvecky.
But understanding your strengths and blind spots isn’t the only place the Enneagram helps EAs. It also makes you more efficient in your job. “When you can change your line of questioning and your communication style to speak more directly to the people you work with and support, you can get time back in your day. Time is the thing EAs manage and it is the thing we all want more of!” laughs Medvecky.
Wondering what the nine Enneagram personality styles are?
Type 1 Perfectionist/Improver/Reformers are organized, detail-oriented, and efficient. They work hard to get things right. Their attention automatically goes to what needs improvement and correction.
Their superpower is to improve output, to maintain high standards in a work environment and find practical solutions to work-related problems. Type 1s keep us constantly improving.
Type 2 Helper/Supporters are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to the needs, preferences and desires of the people around them. Their attention goes out to the needs of others but self-care can be difficult for them.
Their superpower is to boost team morale, provide broad support, improve office communication, and to create a positive work environment. Type 2s bring the human connection to the organization and help keep the workplace an enjoyable place to work.
Type 3 Achiever/Performers are energetic, optimistic, competitive, and goal-oriented. Focused on achievement and success, Type 3s are the goal-seeking sprinters of the Enneagram.
Their superpower is winning and achieving. These are the goal-seeking sprinters of the Enneagram, aggressively working to succeed in their initiatives and beat the competition. Type 3s drive us to achieve our initiatives.
Type 4 Individualists are intuitive, sensitive, and value individuality and authenticity. With high emotional fluency, their attention goes to what is missing. They seek meaning in their work.
Their superpower is innovation, original expression, and to interpret the unspoken undercurrents in professional situations. Type 4s bring a remarkable perception to the workplace. Type 4s help us hear the quiet undercurrents in the workplace.
Type 5 Investigators are reserved, curious, analytical, and insightful. Their habit of attention goes to guarding their resources (including time and energy).
Their superpower is clear, rational thought and deep focus. Type 5s bring the ability to stay steadily dedicated to complicated and thorny problems. Type 5s help us relentlessly pursue knowledge around our business issues.
Type 6 Loyalist/Skeptics are responsible, reliable, and they value security and loyalty. Their habit of attention goes to what could go wrong or be a threat.
Their superpower is critical thinking and eliminating threats in the workplace. Type 6s bring a security-minded, problem-seeking perspective to the office. Type 6s help to keep us safe.
Type 7s Enthusiasts are upbeat, fast-paced, curious, and place a lot of focus on enjoyment, being happy, and future planning. Their habit of attention goes to the positive, new, and exciting.
Their superpower is curiosity, lateral thinking, expansive vision, and an upbeat approach to work. Their focus on the positive and the possible makes them valuable for brainstorming, strategy, and vision. Type 7s help keep us expansive and growing.
Type 8s Leader/Challengers are blunt, direct, “what you see is what you get” people with forceful, big personalities. Their habit of attention goes to power and feeling in control.
Their superpower is decisive thinking, bold action, and a tenacity to get things over the finish line. Type 8s bring a direct, no-nonsense approach to the corporate environment and stay focused on actionable goals and initiatives. Type 8s help lead us through difficult issues.
Type 9 Peacemaker/Mediators are naturally able to understand multiple perspectives and are accommodating, good listeners. With a habit of attention that goes to harmony, they have a mellow, go-with-the-flow attitude.
Their superpower is collaboration, mediation, and getting different perspectives to work harmoniously together. Type 9s bring a soothing, inclusive attitude to the workplace and can often be the glue of a team or office. Type 9s help bring harmony to the office.
- Learn how to discover your type or bring the Enneagram to your office. Individual or group sessions are available.
- Enroll in EA Enneagram’s five week program designed specifically for EAs.
The best Executive Assistants don’t just manage time. They manage energy, power, and emotional undercurrents. The Enneagram gives language to what they’re already sensing and when you can name what’s happening, you can influence it.