Type 9: Peacemaker/Mediator

Overview

Type Nine is called the Peacemaker or the Meditator because of their focus on harmony and their mellow, go-with-the-flow attitude. Peacemaker 9s are naturally able to understand multiple perspectives and are exceptional listeners. They offer a non-judgmental environment that allows others to be heard and often deescalate highly-charged situations. Peacemaker 9s are so good at understanding the position of others that they sometimes “forget” themselves and lose their own perspectives and agendas. Many Peacemaker 9s reach a point in their life where they look up and think “I never lived my life. I never did any of the things I wanted to do….” They are slow to change and tend to measure things in years and decades. Conflict is extremely uncomfortable for Peacemaker 9s. In order to avoid it, they often become passive-aggressive or stubborn.

Gifts to the World

Peacemaker 9s offer the world peace and understanding. They value a harmonious, smooth environment and will work hard to achieve that for the rest of us. Gifted listeners with a soothing presence, Peacemaker 9s can mediate and heal the most acrimonious situations. Sometimes described as the most powerful type in the Enneagram, when Peacemaker 9s find their own center and advocate from a point of personal strength, they can move mountains through their balanced, reasonable approach and influence on others.

Type Nines Typically Report

1) They Really Dislike Conflict
Most Peacemaker 9s report conflict is extremely anxiety-provoking, and they may actually give up things that are important to them to avoid a conflict. To a Peacemaker 9, “it’s just not worth it.” They usually report that in the rare instances they are willing to engage in or even initiate a conflict, it is on the behalf of someone else.
“Conflict makes me anxious, and I feel like I almost vanish in the face of a serious conflict. Harmony, on the other hand, feels like security. I’m sensitive to it and try to cultivate harmony around me, even in situations that don’t directly affect me.”

 

2) They Procrastinate
Peacemaker 9s are famous for their procrastination and putting the unimportant things ahead of the important things. They typically put the needs of other people ahead of their own and engage in busy-ness but not “right action.” This dissipates and reduces their energy for their own goals. Sloth is considered the Peacemaker 9 vice, and Peacemaker 9s often need the pressure of a deadline to be moved to action on important things.
“I knew I was a Peacemaker 9 when I had a day with a long list of errands to do. I was really efficient that day and completed about 15 of the 20 things on the list. And when I looked at the last 5, I realized they were things that were just for me, no one else. It is really easy for me to put myself at the bottom of the list…”
“Doing things that are important to me is a real challenge. I know what I want, but I don’t take action to do it. When I really unpackage my inaction, I think it is a fear of disappointment. I’ve gotten so used to being ignored or not getting what I want that the thought of setting myself up for another disappointment is hard, even painful.”

 

3) They Rarely Feel Anger Real-Time
Peacemaker 9s experience a delayed reaction to anger and rarely get angry in the moment when something upsetting occurs. This doesn’t mean they don’t get angry—it just often gets repressed for weeks, months or even years. The expression of anger works differently for different Peacemaker 9s. Some don’t actually feel the anger until much later, and some feel it but repress it. Almost all Peacemaker 9s report a long delay in expressing anger about something upsetting to them.
“The anger needs to build up to a point where I feel like it is really worth it to say something. This can last for long periods of time. I recognized I was growing when I started to get angry a few days after an upsetting event. This was a big improvement as it used to take months or even years…”

Tools for Compassion If You Have Peacemaker 9s in Your Life

1) Ask Them About Themselves
Peacemaker 9s have a soothing presence and a non-judgmental attitude that makes them gifted listeners. However, they rarely turn the attention back to themselves. It is important not to take advantage of their listening skills and to ask them about themselves.

 

2) Recognize Quick Decision Making Can Be Hard for Them
Peacemaker 9s consider many different perspectives when making decisions. As such, their decision-making process can feel very slow. They weigh the perspectives of all the relevant parties and try to judge the larger implications, always with an eye towards maintaining harmony. They don’t like to be pressured and pushing them to try to decide quickly is usually ineffective and counterproductive. They often become passive-aggressive.

 

3) Understand that Change is Hard for Them
Peacemaker 9s value harmony as the top priority, and they merge with their environment as a strategy to maintain harmony. Change involves uncertainty and inherently requires severing ties with at least some parts of the environment. This can feel like loss and is extremely uncomfortable and anxiety-provoking for Peacemaker 9s. Since it makes them so uncomfortable, they spend a lot of time and energy weighing the pros and cons of change, with a tendency to over assign importance to the elements that support the status quo. Many Peacemaker 9s will stay in dysfunctional situations (jobs, relationships, environments) much longer than other types. This is because the experience of change is so uncomfortable for  Peacemaker 9s.
Learn more about Peacemaker 9s in relationships in “The Nine Keys: A Guide Book To Unlock Your Relationships Using Kundalini Yoga and the Enneagram.”